Liam Brannan sits at his desk writing his weekly letter. Books are stacked all around his work space. Reading an entire book is another weekly activity for Liam, at this point it was a new book on queer theory. He keeps up these while balancing his art major, LGBTQ studies, Women and Gender Studies and sociology minors at 20 credit hours a quarter, 8 more credit hours than the average student. His cat, Tubby, tries to distract him by rubbing up against him, jumping on the desk and finally lying across the work he is trying to complete. Tubby moves to sit in Liam’s wheelchair. Tubby now decorated the wheelchair along with Liam’s trans and gay pride flags.
During Liam’s first week on campus, the needs of his identities were already not being met by the university. Liam’s housing options were already limited. There are very few freshman housing options that are accessible, and the ones that are, happen to be the more expensive ones on campus. Combine this with Liam being a trans man, who is uncomfortable with sharing a room with cis men or women, and a situation was created that DePaul would not accommodate.
Liam approached DePaul housing months in advance about ensure that he was able to get a single room, but they stalled on meeting the request. By the time he reached DePaul for his first week of classes, the request still had not been met. The solution housing offered was not exactly what Liam was hoping for.
“If you want a single room, you need to change to gender to female in our records,” an email from the housing office stated. That email is what lead to Liam crying in Bill Johnson-Gonzalez’s office after Liam’s second class with him.
“I just couldn’t do it,” said Liam, “They wanted me to identify as someone who I wasn’t.”
Bill, who is the Director of DePaul LGBTQ Studies minor, was able to contact the housing office and get Liam the housing he needed without having to change his gender in DePaul’s records.
Near the start of fall quarter Public Safety broke Liam’s wheelchair while trying to transport him.
These were just the beginning of many issues Liam would have when dealing with different DePaul offices. DePaul’s Center for Students with Disabilities (CSD), an office that is supposed to be dedicated to ensuring that student with disabilities are getting the accommodations they need, informed Liam that Public Safety would no longer be able to transport them around campus because he was too large of a liability. When Liam inquired how he was supposed to get around campus if Public Safety’s escort service was not available to him.
Their answer, “Take a Lyft.”
Even with these discriminatory acts taking place, Liam has been able to find part of DePaul that continue to uplift his identities.
The LGBTQ studies department is one of these things for him. Liam, at the end of freshman year, is almost done with both his LGBTQ Studies and Women and Genders Studies requirement. When he talks about the way his LGBTQ Studies introduction class had him hooked, his face and eyes brighten. Bill made Liam feel seen. The passion that these classes have opened in Liam have led him to wanting to become a professor himself.
“I would really love to show up to class in drag,” said Liam.
He has taken the things he has learned and began applying them to his art. He is currently working a narrative film that captures the intersection of gender, sexuality and disabled identities. The film explores the idea of wrong body theory, in regard to both his gender and disability.
“I don’t think I was born in the wrong body,” said Liam, “My body is fine the way it is. Society is the one with the issue.”
Liam’s film also touches on his experiences being a trans man who is also disabled.
“Being trans people already read as less masculine,” said Liam, “They don’t see just a dude in wheelchair.”
Even if that was what everyone saw when Liam wheeled past them on campus, the emasculation would still be taking place. The infantilization and emasculation that disabled men face is often talked about in the disabled community. However, able-bodied people do not even think about this type of marginalization. They are often the ones causing this harm.
“I can’t be in the Quad for five minutes without someone coming up and patronizing me,” said Liam.
The competing themes of not getting enough help and getting too much is something that Liam attempts to balance daily. Tubby helps. He keeps up Liam’s spirits and distracts him when he is getting overwhelmed. His mere presence in Liam’s space offers some comfort.
“Being able to have him is the only good thing CDS has done for me,” said Liam showing maybe the 20th picture of Tubby on his phone.
Liam is balancing much more than most other freshmen students. His planner is filled with colored assignments. He has had to add sticky notes to his planner to fit everything that he has to do on to the page. For Liam, it is not the daunting list of to do that stresses him out. It is the fact that he cannot just do things that stresses him.
At the end of the day there is really only a few things Liam wants. He just wants to go to his classes, get the accommodations he needs, become a professor and be a dude in a wheelchair.